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Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Getting Impatient

I can't beleive it has been over two weeks since Mason was born. However, it seems as if he has been in the NICU forever now!! It is so exhausting going up 2 sometimes 3 times a day...not to mention getting up twice a night to pump! (I could open my own dairy!) I am not meaning to complain, but I just want to bring my boy home!! It is so hard to leave him every single night. I know he is in good care, but I just want to get him home to start living our lives with him in our everyday activities. Reece asks every day if this is the day Mason gets to come home! I think he is even more impatient than I am!!

Scott and I feel as if we have been on a roller coaster for the past two weeks. Having a child born with a syndrome which no one has ever seen nor heard about can be the most terrifying thing for a parent to experience. The mere thought of my child struggling or hurting just tears me to pieces. At first I kept wondering "Why Me?" But now it is a different "Why Me?" I wonder why God picked me to be the mother of this amazing and special little boy. I have great fears....fears that I will not be everything he needs me to be....fears I cannot even describe. He continues to amaze us everyday....he has already beat a number of odds....he is so much stronger than I could ever be....he is just a little angel!!!

Please take a moment to visit www.cdlsusa.org.

6 comments:

Misty said...

LOVE that picture! Your blog entry echos what so many of us feel when we have a little one with a syndrome that is not well known. It is scary to face a syndrome and health issues, but believe me when I say that it gets easier. and your little one will continue to amaze you EVERYDAY! I am hoping and praying that his hospital stay doesn't last too long. Megan, take this time to get TONS of rest and spend some alone time with reese and scott (even for just a day!). I know that is easier said than done, but Mason is in good hands :). give mason a squeeze from mason in CO! :)

Leenie said...

God chose you because of the support system you have and what a great person you are. What ever help you need, you know we all will be there for you. I know I don't know what you are going thru or feeling but you know you can come over anytime to vent or talk. With the ups and downs your family will be there no matter what.

Jen said...

Ditto what Leenie said! You and Scott and Reese are the perfect family for little Mason. He's going to thrive with you guys!

mommy to an angel said...

I can't imagine the pain your heart feels wanting Mason to be home with you guys and being torn between two precious little boys - one at home, one at the hospital, but I pray every day that God provides you guys with the comfort, strength and peace that you need to get through each day. I have no idea why God chooses some parents to be blessed with certain things, but I know that God must think highly of you and Scott to put such a precious little boy in your lives and God knows you guys are strong enough to handle it.
The situation is what it is, but it doesn't mean you can't vent or complain - you're only human! We're all here for you to vent to anytime you need to, we'll be a shoulder to cry on and legs to stand on when you feel like you can't stand on your own.
Thanks for sharing Mason with me last night, I felt privledged to go to the hospital with you for a visit. As I held Mason in my arms I just couldn't understand how there could be something wrong with him...he is the most precious little boy, adorable in every way...and then I realized - there isn't anything wrong...he's just Mason Scott Gilbert - exactly who God planned for him to be and he's perfect in every way!!

Anonymous said...

God has big plans for the Gilbert Family! Little Mason is loved so much...and we barely even know him yet. Just wait until he comes home. Lots of smooches from Aunt Ree Ree.
Whatever you need, just ask and you shall receive!

Anonymous said...

Hi Megan, my name is De and I work with your sister Anne Marie at Franciscan's. Congratulation's, your baby boy is beautiful. You can see he already has personality and stregnth that beams through his pictures. A lot of times people think that because babies are premature, or "came early" you have to wait to see them act like "real babies". Well let me tell you, being a mom of twins that came at 27 weeks, our "real babies" are strong and have just as much fight in them as the next little guy. Kiss your big boys, both of them, and gear up, get preparred for Mason to come home. That's when the real fun begans. Enjoy your peanut he's soo cute.